Navigating Thanksgiving With a Picky Eater

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite days and it’s meant to feel cozy and connected—but for the families I work with, it can also feel stressful. A parent recently told me that she’s “dreading” the day. New foods, big crowds, and pressure from well-meaning relatives (hello grandma!) can turn the holiday table into a battleground. The good news? With a little planning and a lot of compassion, you can enjoy the day without powering through meltdowns or mealtime standoffs.

1. Bring a “Safe Food”

Pack at least one food your child reliably eats. This isn’t “giving in”—it’s helping them feel secure. When a child knows they’ll have something on their plate they can handle, they’re more open to exploring the rest of the meal. Wherever we traveled, I made a huge fruit salad knowing that my kids could fill up on their favorite fruits.

2. Keep the Pressure Low

As well meaning as it i, avoid phrases like “Take a bite–just try it!” or “You loved this last year!” Pressure turns off curiosity. Instead, let your child observe, smell, touch, or simply coexist with the food. Quiet confidence from you goes a long way.

3. Prep Them Ahead of Time

Talk through what the day will look like—who will be there, what foods they might see, and where they’ll sit. Predictability reduces anxiety, which can make tasting something new feel less overwhelming. Try reading a Thanksgiving book together or even create your own book about the family you’ll see at the table.

4. Set Boundaries With Relatives

Most comments from family come from love—but they can still feel stressful for your child. A simple, polite script works wonders:
“We’re working on helping them feel calm around new foods and want today to be stress-free. Please let them eat what they’d like”

5. Involve Your Child in the Prep

Even if they won’t eat the turkey or green beans, stirring, dumping, mixing, or arranging food gives them a non-eating way to interact with new ingredients. That exposure builds familiarity—and over time, comfort. AND, if they do decide to taste it later, play it cool and do your celebrating later outside of their hearing!

6. Focus on Connection, Not Consumption

I say it all the time: Food is Connection. Thanksgiving is not the day to push new foods. It is the day to help kids feel safe, included, and part of the celebration. A stress-free meal today supports more adventurous eating later.

Snack Idea:

Pumpkin Yogurt Dip & crackers

Mix a little pumpkin puree and a drizzle of maple syrup into vanilla yogurt. Use apple slices or graham crackers to dip.

Reach out at Karen@CoastalFamilyNutrition.com or call the office at 603-674-2479.

Please feel free to share this with someone who may like to learn more about feeding kiddos!